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tb2830
04-07-2010, 12:53 AM
for anyone who has had to read my rants on facebook normally i am not like that but i am so angry at the moment.

obviously a few of you already know what ive been through this week well now i feel i need to fill you all in.

as you all know i had my grandads funeral on wednesday but what alot of you didnt know is that my kind hearted wonderful husband walked out on me and the kids two days before the funeral.

tonight me and the kids went out to celebrate my aunties 50th birthday and came home to find that craig had stole my car (even thou i had put the lock on) and in replace of it was my dead grandfathers car.

fuming is not the words i want to use right now infact they are alot more graffic........

he will not answer his phone and neither will his mother......

chloe broke her heart when she saw what he had done

and as harsh as it may sound i will do everything in my power to keep him and his family away from me and my children.

tomorrow my father is going straight to his mothers with my cousin for support to bring my car back.

Johnie
04-07-2010, 01:27 AM
:hug2: you don't need to apologize for anything

tb2830
04-07-2010, 01:34 AM
:hug2: you don't need to apologize for anything


thank you :hug2:

i am sooooooooo angry i think im gonna burst lol

Tink
04-07-2010, 03:35 AM
Your CAR??? Your PINK CAR??? What a louse. OMG. I'm going to stop now because I'm too wicked angry with this!

I knew you were upset and that something awful had happened, but had no idea this was what he'd done.

Get the police involved. He cannot possibly get away with stealing your CAR!!! :hopmad:

Shellyamc
04-07-2010, 06:12 AM
There are no words..well..there are words, but I can't post them here :furious:

I have a shovel..I just need to know where and when!:nono:

Deb
04-07-2010, 06:42 AM
No need to apologise Tracey :hug2: As far as I'm concerned FB is for you to share with your friends what ever you're feeling.

I am feeling so angry on your behalf hun, I really am. What a total....well, I can't use the words here that describe him and what he's done. Lots of love and hugs to you and your lovely kids xxxxx

tb2830
04-07-2010, 06:52 AM
Your CAR??? Your PINK CAR??? What a louse. OMG. I'm going to stop now because I'm too wicked angry with this!

I knew you were upset and that something awful had happened, but had no idea this was what he'd done.

Get the police involved. He cannot possibly get away with stealing your CAR!!! :hopmad:


im not even bothered about it being the car as after all its just a car its how he did it and how we came back to grandads car being on my drive

Skywatcher
04-07-2010, 06:56 AM
:hug2:


Beyond belief

daveann
04-07-2010, 06:58 AM
:hug2:

Claire
04-07-2010, 07:09 AM
:comfort:

mumof2
04-07-2010, 07:35 AM
Please don't apologise Tracy sweetheart, no need whatsoever :hug2:

What a terrible dreadful shock it must have been for you all, what the H**L went through his mind when he did that???

Is the car in your name Tracy, is he on the insurance? If it's in your name and you (obviously) didn't give him permission to take it I think you can call the police. I'm not sure if it would be a 'domestic' or not though?

big hugs all round for you and the children :hug2::hug2::hug2::hug2:

tb2830
04-07-2010, 07:48 AM
Please don't apologise Tracy sweetheart, no need whatsoever :hug2:

What a terrible dreadful shock it must have been for you all, what the H**L went through his mind when he did that???

Is the car in your name Tracy, is he on the insurance? If it's in your name and you (obviously) didn't give him permission to take it I think you can call the police. I'm not sure if it would be a 'domestic' or not though?

big hugs all round for you and the children :hug2::hug2::hug2::hug2:


nope i havent a leg to stand on

when he have me the slip to tax the car with my details as new keeper he never sent the log book off

today i am still fuming

i have managed to sleep for the whole of 3 hours :thumbsdown:

Isafari
04-07-2010, 08:05 AM
:hug2:
Just when you think (can't even bring myself to say his name!) - HE can't stoop any lower, he's crawling on his belly again. :argue:
Tracy, you've suffered enough over the years with him - enough is enough sweetheart.

It's not only you he hurts, it's your beautiful kids too. Get a grip. Stay strong. Get your life back on track as best you can. We're all here for support any time you need it.....anytime. :hug2:

tb2830
04-07-2010, 08:08 AM
nothing amazes me anymore :thumbsdown:

Deafjeff
04-07-2010, 08:17 AM
Can't believe that some people are able to do this!!!!!!!!!!
:hug2:

mumof2
04-07-2010, 08:25 AM
nope i havent a leg to stand on

when he have me the slip to tax the car with my details as new keeper he never sent the log book off

today i am still fuming

i have managed to sleep for the whole of 3 hours :thumbsdown:


does that make a difference then, did you not get a new log book? we've had cars in the past with no log books and got new ones for them.....

oh G-d, i'm just so sorry for what he's been putting you all through :hug2:

tb2830
04-07-2010, 09:09 AM
at the moment my head is ready to explode not sure wether its due to the wine i had or the fact im fuming

mumof2
04-07-2010, 09:11 AM
at the moment my head is ready to explode not sure wether its due to the wine i had or the fact im fuming



:hug1:

arkvilla
04-07-2010, 09:44 AM
I don't know all the background hiastory Tracey but it sounds like you've had a lot of bad stuff going on with your ex and I really hope you can get this sorted.

How he could do that to you and the children is just so low... it's just his way to get back at you for moving on but it ABSOLUTELY shows you that yopu must never give in to him as his true colours are shown and if he can treat his own children like this then he has no love in him.

Don't let him drag you down Tracy xxx

Sandra

tb2830
04-07-2010, 09:50 AM
thank you for all the lovely messages .... i'll probably end up jumping back in bed for a couple of hours after dinner to try and clear my head :yes:

Britchick
04-07-2010, 10:07 AM
I really am speechless Tracy! :hug2:

Kate
04-07-2010, 11:02 AM
Oh no that is just so low, what a complete and utter *******. Everything about what he did is just so wrong, only a complete lowlife would do something like that.

Im so sorry youre going through all of this at the moment :hug2:

tb2830
04-07-2010, 11:03 AM
Oh no that is just so low, what a complete and utter *******. Everything about what he did is just so wrong, only a complete lowlife would do something like that.

Im so sorry youre going through all of this at the moment :hug2:


even the word lowlife is too good for him

Kate
04-07-2010, 11:04 AM
Id like to use stronger - but it would just be censored!!

tb2830
04-07-2010, 11:04 AM
Id like to use stronger - but it would just be censored!!


well last night i could of gave chubby brown a run for his money :donald:

mumof2
04-07-2010, 11:14 AM
i saw what your Chloe said on your Fb message, poor girl :hug2:

how old are your children again Tracy?

tb2830
04-07-2010, 11:15 AM
i saw what your Chloe said on your Fb message, poor girl :hug2:

how old are your children again Tracy?

chloe is 13 then chelsea 17 courtney 10 tyler is 9

chloe was distraught last night infact i think she didnt go to bed till 4 either

mumof2
04-07-2010, 11:16 AM
chloe is 13 then chelsea 17 courtney 10 tyler is 9



thanks hun, i forget these things! it's my age :unsure:

tb2830
04-07-2010, 11:19 AM
thanks hun, i forget these things! it's my age :unsure:

:hug2: thats ok

xx

josh.p.
04-07-2010, 11:22 AM
Im utterly speechless. :hug2:

tb2830
04-07-2010, 01:47 PM
Im utterly speechless. :hug2:

you dont need to say nothing josh :hug2: i understand

Beccaberry
04-07-2010, 02:13 PM
Oh Tracy :(

:hug2: :hug2:

Johnie
04-07-2010, 03:58 PM
Tracy hon, I completely understand. I had a police officer tell me that Mike could take my car whenever he wanted to because we are married. No matter that the car is in my name only and that I am the one paying for it. I will never forget that feeling.

Hang in there hon :hug2: I'm here if you need me.

Tink
04-07-2010, 03:59 PM
By the way, dear woman. Anything you say at Facebook is your own business. Nothing you say there will be carried over to here. :hug2:

Tink
04-07-2010, 04:00 PM
Tracy hon, I completely understand. I had a police officer tell me that Mike could take my car whenever he wanted to because we are married. No matter that the car is in my name only and that I am the one paying for it. I will never forget that feeling.

Hang in there hon :hug2: I'm here if you need me.

Seriously? OMG! I mean, I know you are serious, but that just makes my stomach turn. Are there no protections then? Other than physical (such as THOSE are) I mean?

Dawn
04-07-2010, 04:01 PM
Well I'm lucky enough to have met the git and ended up spending most of the evening hiding from him in Teresa's kitchen because it was hate at first sight.

Get out and get a new start for you and the kids. :hug2:

tb2830
04-07-2010, 04:11 PM
Well I'm lucky enough to have met the git and ended up spending most of the evening hiding from him in Teresa's kitchen because it was hate at first sight.

Get out and get a new start for you and the kids. :hug2:


you sure did dawn :hug2: :sorry:

i will i promise

(sorry just wanted to add dawn if i could of came without bringing him i would of done i really wanted to meet you and with how controlling he is it was my only option)

Tinker
04-07-2010, 04:32 PM
Tracey, I am so sorry, sweetie . He is not worth the dog dung that is scraped off of a shoe after stepped in . I don't know your history, but know that you are a dear sweet lady and don't deserve to be treated this way . How someone that supposedly loves you & his children could be so utterly unsensitive is beyond me . Especially with you mourning the death of your dear grandfather , I can only say what others have, he's not worthy of your love . Do what you have too and dump the creep . :hug2:

tb2830
04-07-2010, 04:49 PM
Tracey, I am so sorry, sweetie . He is not worth the dog dung that is scraped off of a shoe after stepped in . I don't know your history, but know that you are a dear sweet lady and don't deserve to be treated this way . How someone that supposedly loves you & his children could be so utterly unsensitive is beyond me . Especially with you mourning the death of your dear grandfather , I can only say what others have, he's not worthy of your love . Do what you have too and dump the creep . :hug2:

he has been well and truly dumped :yes:

Johnie
04-07-2010, 04:58 PM
Seriously? OMG! I mean, I know you are serious, but that just makes my stomach turn. Are there no protections then? Other than physical (such as THOSE are) I mean?


Oh yes it's all true :sorry: Why do you think I packed up and moved to my parent's house? I couldn't get ANYONE to help me make him leave. Not a single agency.

tb2830
04-07-2010, 05:02 PM
johnie its shocking

i suppose im lucky in the aspect that he left

i am constantly finding his things as i go round the house and they have ended straight in the rubbish bin

Johnie
04-07-2010, 05:14 PM
Good for you hon! I know how hard it is. You love someone and you want to beleive they will treat you with respect and courtesy. But, they don't. But sometimes you have to straighten that spine and say enough is enough. Love is not enough.

tb2830
04-07-2010, 05:18 PM
Good for you hon! I know how hard it is. You love someone and you want to beleive they will treat you with respect and courtesy. But, they don't. But sometimes you have to straighten that spine and say enough is enough. Love is not enough.


my problem was that i met him at 18 and he dominated my life for so long that i didnt see it .... well not until i changed and became more independant.....i was so scared of change that i carried on putting up with it.........i use to hate being lonely and thinking no one esle would want to be with me .... but now im not bothered

Johnie
04-07-2010, 05:30 PM
:hug2: oh honey, you are a beautiful, smart, fun and caring woman. Anyone would be honored to have you in their life. Don't let some stupid man let you think you aren't worthy of anything :nono: He's the one who is not worthy.

I've been with Mike since I was 21. I understand that part of being with someone for so long. I can't even fathom going out with anyone else though. Thankfully, I don't want to at this point.

tb2830
04-07-2010, 05:32 PM
:hug2: oh honey, you are a beautiful, smart, fun and caring woman. Anyone would be honored to have you in their life. Don't let some stupid man let you think you aren't worthy of anything :nono: He's the one who is not worthy.

I've been with Mike since I was 21. I understand that part of being with someone for so long. I can't even fathom going out with anyone else though. Thankfully, I don't want to at this point.


perhaps single is the way to go lol

Johnie
04-07-2010, 05:35 PM
:tongue: perhaps it is. I think it's good to allow yourself some freedom to explore who you are without the added stress of a relationship. I personally don't know that I ever want a really serious relationship again. Definately no to marriage :nono:

tb2830
04-07-2010, 05:55 PM
:tongue: perhaps it is. I think it's good to allow yourself some freedom to explore who you are without the added stress of a relationship. I personally don't know that I ever want a really serious relationship again. Definately no to marriage :nono:


yes i am the same another marriage will scare me and i dont think i would ever live with anyone again i would be constantly worrying about them leaving and i dont want anything bought for me ever again because of craig i will be scared that it will go

i think im pretty much doomed lol

Tinker
04-07-2010, 06:02 PM
I Agree with Johnie, Tracey . You are a smart, caring, wonderful person and you will be just fine . When you two are least expecting it, that perfect someone will come along .

tb2830
04-07-2010, 06:48 PM
im not so sure tinker

this has really knocked the stuffing out of me

Deb
04-07-2010, 07:49 PM
Tracey hun, when you are ready for something it will come along....not before....so don't worry about it yet. But we humans are very resilient and we can get through things. Keep going and you will get through this and out of the other side, and leave it behind. We're all here for you anytime hun xxx :hug2:

tb2830
04-07-2010, 08:36 PM
i'll be just fine

dont need a man by my side to enjoy life :yes:

im just gonna live for the moment

Johnie
04-07-2010, 09:39 PM
Exactly right Tracy!

Today I have declared this MY Independence Day. You should make it yours as well :yes:

tb2830
04-07-2010, 09:48 PM
Exactly right Tracy!

Today I have declared this MY Independence Day. You should make it yours as well :yes:
:hug2: ok johnie

i declare that today is MY independance day too

ukwdwnut
05-07-2010, 12:46 AM
Well I'm lucky enough to have met the git and ended up spending most of the evening hiding from him in Teresa's kitchen because it was hate at first sight.

Get out and get a new start for you and the kids. :hug2:

i remember that day so well dawn, i wondered where you got to


my problem was that i met him at 18 and he dominated my life for so long that i didnt see it .... well not until i changed and became more independant.....i was so scared of change that i carried on putting up with it.........i use to hate being lonely and thinking no one esle would want to be with me .... but now im not bothered

hey dont you ever start thinking like that trace, you are a beautiful woman and no decent man in his right mind would give up a chance to be with you, seriously. not all men are the same as him. i know he can be a right barsteward but to steal your car sums him up really it does


im not so sure tinker

this has really knocked the stuffing out of me

you might have had the stuffing knocked out of you now, but give it a while you will pick yourself up and get on with the rest of your life. i hope you stick to your word this time, he will only keep dragging you down time and again. good luck and be strong hun :hug2::hug2: xx

Skywatcher
05-07-2010, 07:17 AM
:hug2:

Never go back, keep moving forward

you have closed that chapeter on your life once and for all now

:hug2:

tb2830
05-07-2010, 08:20 AM
feel heaps better today :yes:

ukwdwnut
05-07-2010, 08:27 AM
feel heaps better today :yes:

onwards and upwards trace :D

:hug2:

MarkE
05-07-2010, 08:41 AM
In February 1997, my dad told my mom in front a rather packed ASDA car park that he was leaving her. In August, he moved to America. Just like you, my mom worked in Lloyds Pharmacy!!

After promising to keep a roof over our heads and to pay all the essential bills, by the end of the year he decided that helping mom pay for a car for us wasn't essential, so that went. Luckily, my grandad bought mom a car outright (that she still drives to this day). Then, sadly, the house went too. He just decided that it wasn't important enough any more. His new wife and her kids took priority.

I'm not saying that he has anybody else... but the someone / something that is making him act like this will turn on him and haunt him one day. And believe me, I say with the heaviest of hearts, that what goes around, comes around. My heart aches every time I think of what has happened to my family (well, more specifiaclly, him) in the past ten years, but for my mom, and for you... there is light at the end of the tunnel, and you will 'get yours' too - happiness without his is the sweetest for of revenge.

Just keep believing that everything happens for a reason, and that somehow, he'll pay one day...

tb2830
05-07-2010, 08:46 AM
thank you mark:hug2:

everything that your dad did to your mum is exactly what he is doing to us

my kids know that they will be just fine with me

chloe doesnt even like her dad anymore (his loss) and she was always daddys girl

xxxx

mainecoon lover
05-07-2010, 12:53 PM
I am so so sorry hun :hug2:

MystikPiglit
05-07-2010, 04:31 PM
:comfort:


he has been well and truly dumped :yes:

If you should ever start to waver just remember the car incident. The anger will keep you strong. :hug2:


yes i am the same another marriage will scare me
i think im pretty much doomed lol

No, you really aren't. :hug2:
After my first marriage I would have bet you a million pounds that I wouldn't do it again but 3 months after meeting my husband I didn't hesitate for a second when he proposed. That was 17 years ago. There is a handsome Prince out there somewhere for every Cinderella. :yes:

tb2830
05-07-2010, 10:32 PM
at the moment he is threatening to come to the house because his passport is here

ive told him no car no passport

i have the phone by me ready to phone the police

Mari
05-07-2010, 10:35 PM
OMG!

:hug2:

tb2830
05-07-2010, 10:36 PM
so wish i owned a baseball bat :donald:

josh.p.
05-07-2010, 10:39 PM
Hey.. if nothing else.. you had the last laugh, he was the one driving round in a bright pink mini with 'powered my pixie dust' written on it :rotfl:

Tink
05-07-2010, 10:45 PM
I thought of that, Josh! Fool man. :snooty:

I hope he gets a big ol' Bear asking him out. Go ahead and mess with that one!

Good deal, Tracy. No car, no passport. I like that.

You don't have a baseball bat, but do you have an iron skillet? A good old broom handle? :D

Ok, ok... no violence. :D

tb2830
05-07-2010, 10:46 PM
Hey.. if nothing else.. you had the last laugh, he was the one driving round in a bright pink mini with 'powered my pixie dust' written on it :rotfl:


too right :donald:

tb2830
05-07-2010, 10:47 PM
I thought of that, Josh! Fool man. :snooty:

I hope he gets a big ol' Bear asking him out. Go ahead and mess with that one!

Good deal, Tracy. No car, no passport. I like that.

You don't have a baseball bat, but do you have an iron skillet? A good old broom handle? :D

Ok, ok... no violence. :D


i have a frying pan :donald: will that do

Deafjeff
06-07-2010, 06:18 AM
i have a frying pan :donald: will that do

Iron ones?

Britchick
06-07-2010, 06:46 AM
You have to make sure its something that you would grab naturally in self defence ;)

tb2830
06-07-2010, 08:34 AM
just to let you know he didnt turn up so didnt need my frying pan after all

Tink
06-07-2010, 08:36 AM
That's good. Better than he stay away. Hope your week goes well Tracy! :hug2:

tb2830
06-07-2010, 08:37 AM
That's good. Better than he stay away. Hope your week goes well Tracy! :hug2:

thanks tink :hug2:

ive started to look for a new car now :yes:

Tink
06-07-2010, 08:51 AM
I guess I didn't quite follow the whole situation about the car. I know you said he put your GrandDad's car in place of your pink one? Does your GrandDad's car not work?

How are you getting to work without a car!? :sorry: :hug2:

tb2830
06-07-2010, 08:54 AM
I guess I didn't quite follow the whole situation about the car. I know you said he put your GrandDad's car in place of your pink one? Does your GrandDad's car not work?

How are you getting to work without a car!? :sorry: :hug2:

at the moment tink i am using my grandads car to get to work etc but its not ideal for me and nan doesnt really want me to drive it as its too big she would rather i have something smaller :yes:

MarkE
06-07-2010, 08:57 AM
I'm confused, or maybe missed a step / post. what happened to your pink mini? Has he flogged it?

Sam
06-07-2010, 09:12 AM
Hi ya

Just wanted to say sorry for the hassle you're getting at the moment. I am always surprised at how low some people can be, especially to those that they claim to love. Regardless of how he feels about you, he is not even considering the children. :sad:

My neighbour experienced something similar at Christmas. She too has children of similar ages to you and he walked out on them on boxing day. If that wasn't bad enough it was by chance that she found out that he hadn't been paying the mortgage and the bank was due to take repossession of their house on Jan 11th. He owed money all over the place and he had been hiding the post. Fortunately her family clubbed together and helped her out.:thumbsdown:

There's not a lot that anyone can say at the moment to make you feel better, but just keep focusing on the cowardly way your man has acted and remember what goes around, comes around.

Failing that I'm only an hour & half away from you I'll come down and hold him while you use that frying pan.:fryingpan:

Take care of yourself.

:comfort:

tb2830
06-07-2010, 09:12 AM
he nicked it of the drive saturday night mark

tb2830
06-07-2010, 09:16 AM
Hi ya

Just wanted to say sorry for the hassle you're getting at the moment. I am always surprised at how low some people can be, especially to those that they claim to love. Regardless of how he feels about you, he is not even considering the children. :sad:

My neighbour experienced something similar at Christmas. She too has children of similar ages to you and he walked out on them on boxing day. If that wasn't bad enough it was by chance that she found out that he hadn't been paying the mortgage and the bank was due to take repossession of their house on Jan 11th. He owed money all over the place and he had been hiding the post. Fortunately her family clubbed together and helped her out.:thumbsdown:

There's not a lot that anyone can say at the moment to make you feel better, but just keep focusing on the cowardly way your man has acted and remember what goes around, comes around.

Failing that I'm only an hour & half away from you I'll come down and hold him while you use that frying pan.:fryingpan:

Take care of yourself.

:comfort:

lol thanks sam :hug2:

if you see on the news midlands woman on rampage with frying pan you'll all know its me :donald:

tb2830
06-07-2010, 05:47 PM
slightly pee'd of today

kinda feel no matter what i try and do he manages to ruin it one way or another.

and i know i shouldnt be bothered about the car but it was mine and i miss it thou i dont miss him in the slightest.

Johnie
06-07-2010, 05:55 PM
Can I :slap: him?

Don't let him get to you hon :hug2::hug2:

tb2830
06-07-2010, 05:59 PM
i try not to johnie but he makes me sooooooooo angry (i need a stamp my feet smilie)

Britchick
06-07-2010, 06:37 PM
He's using the car as a weapon Tracy, if you don't mention it he won't have any power over you. you'll get another one in the future and it will be all the better. I'm presuming you have sought advice.

tb2830
06-07-2010, 06:45 PM
He's using the car as a weapon Tracy, if you don't mention it he won't have any power over you. you'll get another one in the future and it will be all the better. I'm presuming you have sought advice.


julie i havent a clue where i stand :thumbsdown:

i know i need to forget about the car and prove that im not bothered but i am sooooooo angry :slap: i want to hit him

he is a first class arthur daley he has made sure everything is in his step dads name .... i dont really have a leg to stand on

i really need to see a solicitor

Kate
06-07-2010, 06:46 PM
Do you have a citizens advice bureau you could go to?

tb2830
06-07-2010, 07:36 PM
Do you have a citizens advice bureau you could go to?


i do but now im working everyday it will be hard to find the time

Britchick
06-07-2010, 08:17 PM
Mmm I don't know about possession and the law, who paid for it? If it was from a joint account you may have a case? Solicitors will usually give you a bit of advice for free, maybe you could go in your lunch time?

tb2830
06-07-2010, 08:23 PM
Mmm I don't know about possession and the law, who paid for it? If it was from a joint account you may have a case? Solicitors will usually give you a bit of advice for free, maybe you could go in your lunch time?

no it wasnt out the joint account

ive read up online and it does state that neither of us can sell anything whilst married and that it doesnt matter who bought it and that it will get split between us.

but he will sell it

so i may aswell cut my losses and forget about it

tb2830
06-07-2010, 08:40 PM
ive decided i dont want anything from him i just want him out of my life for good.

i will no longer have to put up with his strange controlling ways and mental abuse that alone will be worth not having.

i will hurt him by moving on. i will make my own happiness and my own memories.

daveann
06-07-2010, 08:54 PM
It's very strange when it comes to who owns what and what's in who's name as everything is classed as joint even gifts from parents of money are joint even if it's in one persons name. Been there done that 2 years of divorce lawyers bumping up there retirement fund.

Tracey don't give up on men I have the most fantastic husband now after 23 years of being told I was stupid and ugly I have a wonderful husband who rubs my feet after a hard day who allows me to scream then gives me a cuddle to make it all better who puts the loo seat down cause he knows women like that sort of thing who buys me a birthday card insead of saying here buy your own I don't have time......... I could go on and on I never knew I could love someone so much and be loved back as much so don't give up :)

tb2830
06-07-2010, 09:04 PM
obviously at the moment its the last thing on mind but yes hopefully someone will be able to prove me wrong.

im having to work through all the issues he has gave me over the years and as much as im fun loving tracy behind closed doors sometimes im a emotional wreck... not because i dont think i can achieve anything but because I allowed him to ruin my life for so long.

im not just having to prove to myself that i can do life without him im having to prove to my family and friends that i wont go weak and have him back ( i wont)

there is nothing left he can do to hurt me he has done it all....the mental abuse the physical abuse.... sometimes im surprised im even here.

josh.p.
06-07-2010, 10:18 PM
:hug2:

tb2830
06-07-2010, 10:24 PM
:hug2:


thanks josh :hug2: just what i needed

ukwdwnut
06-07-2010, 11:06 PM
big HUGZZZZZZ to you trace. you can do it without him :yes:

Beccaberry
06-07-2010, 11:48 PM
I just wanted to share with you something I was told during my divorce, I found it incredibly helpful and used to repeat it to myself LOADS of times during the day....

Any change, any loss, does not make us victims. Others can shake you, surprise you, disappoint you, hurt you, but they can't prevent you from acting, from taking the situation you're presented with and moving on. No matter where you are in life, no matter what your situation, you can always do something. You always have a choice and the choice can be power.

Stay strong hun xox

tb2830
07-07-2010, 07:06 AM
thank you :hug2:

like i said ive decided im not putting my self through any added grief trying to fight for what is right fully mine.

i will walk away with my sanity and nothing esle.

plus i have a date with mickey mouse to look forward to :yes:

Deafjeff
07-07-2010, 07:18 AM
:hug2:

Skywatcher
07-07-2010, 07:18 AM
The mouse will heal all , he always does :D

tb2830
07-07-2010, 08:28 AM
think im gonna crack up today

ive only been up a hour and everything is going wrong

ukwdwnut
07-07-2010, 08:44 AM
think im gonna crack up today

ive only been up a hour and everything is going wrong

take a step back and chill for a bit :hug2:

Tink
07-07-2010, 09:04 AM
Find the one thing going right, and focus on that. You are alive, eh? That's pretty darn right! :hug2:

"Buying your peace" is a valuable concept. As trite as it sounds, "things" are just that, inanimate objects without life. You have yourself, and your children and an exciting new job. Those things are in your control (well, maybe not the children ;) ).

The sooner you extricate yourself from all legal standing with him, the better off you will be. He wants to drive your pink fairy car, let him. What do you care? It's a car. It can be replaced.

Know that every person here values you and knows what a good and kind person you are. THAT'S what matters. :hug2:

Kate
07-07-2010, 09:04 AM
Have a cuppa tea and a packet of biscuits! :yes:

:hug2:

tb2830
07-07-2010, 09:19 AM
cuppa hasnt worked

im on the phone now trying to sort this stupid issue out im about to blow any second

why cant i speak to someone who understands what im saying

Tink
07-07-2010, 09:21 AM
Do my chant... "I need to speak with your supervisor. I need to speak with your supervisor. I need to speak with your supervisor." Seriously, no matter what they say, that's my response. Wears them down eventually and you get someone who (usually) can resolve the situation.

Beccaberry
07-07-2010, 12:42 PM
Deep breaths, hun...deep breaths. Find your power.

MystikPiglit
07-07-2010, 01:23 PM
Things going better yet? :comfort:

tb2830
07-07-2010, 06:25 PM
just popped in to say a quick hi

all bathed and ready to go out with the girls from work

feeling a little bit better

only bitter that ive lost my beautiful pink car :yes: bear with me im sure i'll get over it eventually :hug2:

speak to you all later

might even have new pics tink :yes:

love you all

xxx

Kate
07-07-2010, 06:40 PM
Have a great time Tracey, you deserve to have some fun! :yes:

daveann
07-07-2010, 08:43 PM
Hope your having a relaxing evening with your friends :)

Deb
07-07-2010, 08:48 PM
Heu Trace, have a brilliant chill out night woman... you soooooo deserve it xxxxx

tb2830
07-07-2010, 09:57 PM
yes i had a lovely evening it was just what i needed :yes:

ukwdwnut
08-07-2010, 12:30 AM
glad you had a good time trace, you needed it to take your mind off whats been going on.

hey you can always get another mini and have that sprayed the same when you have the money :yes:

:hug2::hug2:

tb2830
08-07-2010, 07:07 AM
no mick i wouldnt

as each day passes im not so bothered about it.

i wouldnt go and have a car done the same atleast i did have it for a while

ukwdwnut
08-07-2010, 08:10 AM
ok i understand the reasoning behind that, constant reminder and all that i guess :hug2::hug2:

Tink
08-07-2010, 10:18 AM
You'll have a car you like better, Tracy one that is all yours and that can't be taken away. :yes:

It's great that you were able to have some fun and enjoy some time with your friends. :yes: I hope today goes well for you too!

Skywatcher
08-07-2010, 11:18 AM
I still just can't believe the audacity of it all, if defies words.

It makes me want to..... well I best not say really as it wouldn't be very constructive. He is such a malevolent and spiteful little man

Tink
08-07-2010, 11:19 AM
Little being the operative word there.

tb2830
08-07-2010, 02:33 PM
ive had a lovely day tink :yes:
:hug2: for all the lovely messages

Dorothy
08-07-2010, 02:43 PM
I've finally had a chance to catch up on here and I'm so sorry that you've been going through this :hug2: :hug2: I have a very good friend who was sent almost over the edge by her ex, but ya know what....... she made it though to the other side happier, stronger, and in control of her own life. You will get there hun, just hang in there and take each day as it comes and know that we're all here for you :hug2: :hug2:

tb2830
08-07-2010, 03:06 PM
dont worry there is no going back this time

finished for good

had enough

and im no longer willing to take anymore

ukwdwnut
08-07-2010, 03:27 PM
dont worry there is no going back this time

finished for good

had enough

and im no longer willing to take anymore

well done to you trace :D :hug2::hug2:

tb2830
08-07-2010, 04:44 PM
i think some people are surprised as they only met him when he had his nicey nicey act on

so when ive finally told them the truth they cant quite believe it

there are things i cant even tell you on here as im shamed to even have to say them

i sat down last night and put pen to paper and listed everything and even i was shocked at how warped my life was.

im surprised i dont need counciling lol

but like i said there has already been moments where im actually enjoying myself

i love having the whole bed to my self lol yes i dont get cuddles but i didnt get them anyway from that muppet

i can come and go as i please without being questioned about whom ive seen and what have i done

the atmosphere in the house isnt tense anymore which is a major plus

i dont dread coming home from work no more

and thats only now lots of more exciting things will soon happen

xx

Tink
08-07-2010, 04:55 PM
Yes, yes they will! Focus on you and revel in yourself. Love that big beautiful space of a bed and take it all up!!! Be yourself! Do what you find interesting, entertaining, important! :yes: :hug2:

tb2830
08-07-2010, 06:46 PM
Yes, yes they will! Focus on you and revel in yourself. Love that big beautiful space of a bed and take it all up!!! Be yourself! Do what you find interesting, entertaining, important! :yes: :hug2:

well tonights entertainment is

one long hot bubble bath with so many bubbles that there falling out the bath lol

then im going to sit with my headphones on and listen to music and why BECAUSE I CAN lol

ukwdwnut
08-07-2010, 10:47 PM
i think some people are surprised as they only met him when he had his nicey nicey act on

so when ive finally told them the truth they cant quite believe it


thats exactly how he was at teresas wasnt it, he was really nervous i think i remember you saying because he wouldnt stop talking

tb2830
08-07-2010, 10:50 PM
thats exactly how he was at teresas wasnt it, he was really nervous i think i remember you saying because he wouldnt stop talking

no he wasnt nervous

he doesnt stop talking cos its all about him him him

grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

really think you should count your blessings that denise is funny and friendly

ukwdwnut
08-07-2010, 11:02 PM
no he wasnt nervous

he doesnt stop talking cos its all about him him him

grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

really think you should count your blessings that denise is funny and friendly

really i thought you said he was nervous, oh well dont matter anyway. i do remember people getting up and going into the kitchen and i was stuck in the front room, i think i managed to get in there at some point tho

tb2830
08-07-2010, 11:06 PM
really i thought you said he was nervous, oh well dont matter anyway. i do remember people getting up and going into the kitchen and i was stuck in the front room, i think i managed to get in there at some point tho

but once again

i feel like it was my fault

i wanted to come down and that was the only way i could

ukwdwnut
08-07-2010, 11:17 PM
but once again

i feel like it was my fault

i wanted to come down and that was the only way i could

why do you think it was your fault, and whats more what do you think was your fault.

i know you did i remember. it was ok apart from anything else we had a laugh i really enjoyed that weekend :D

tb2830
08-07-2010, 11:24 PM
why do you think it was your fault, and whats more what do you think was your fault.

i know you did i remember. it was ok apart from anything else we had a laugh i really enjoyed that weekend :D

well i didnt enjoy the weekend :sorry: i was on edge the whole day

im glad that i had already met teresa when i went to stay with her before she met him

she noticed the major change in me instantly

but if you remember when i got back war broke out

i dont even know what possesed me to bring him down i should of just not bothered

but to be honest its happened there is no changing it

so i think that one should be a closed book now :yes:

ukwdwnut
08-07-2010, 11:28 PM
well i didnt enjoy the weekend :sorry: i was on edge the whole day

im glad that i had already met teresa when i went to stay with her before she met him

she noticed the major change in me instantly

but if you remember when i got back war broke out

i dont even know what possesed me to bring him down i should of just not bothered

but to be honest its happened there is no changing it

so i think that one should be a closed book now :yes:

she must of, i didnt know obviously as that was the first time i met you

cant remember that exactly but something rings a bell about it.

nope you cant change it, its done and gone

yep book is now firmly closed :D

mumof2
09-07-2010, 01:41 PM
hey you! i'm back now with some more hugs :hug2::hug2:





"Courage is like a muscle. We strengthen it with use" - Ruth Gordon

Wendy
09-07-2010, 02:00 PM
:hug2:

tb2830
09-07-2010, 05:15 PM
hey you! i'm back now with some more hugs :hug2::hug2:





"Courage is like a muscle. We strengthen it with use" - Ruth Gordon

ah welcome back

great to see you :hug2:

Tinkfan
09-07-2010, 10:17 PM
:sorry: Sorry to hear all this Trace, you'll be shocked to find out how easy it is to forget!!! Just remember happiness is the best revenge! :yes:

tb2830
09-07-2010, 10:20 PM
yes definately tinkfan

and i am happy :yes:

having a look around this weekend for a new car :yes:

piglet
11-07-2010, 11:47 AM
Hi Tracy, thought I'd just drop you a quick line. Haven't been on for ages so I've only just found out about your news. Take care hun, so many of us have been in that situation where the guy has abused us so constantly and totally lowered our self esteem that we really believe them when they say it is all our fault. After a time you will realise (if you haven't yet) that we were not to blame and that the fault lay with them. You will have really down days when you may (?) actually miss him and then you will realise that with the strength regained that he had taken away from you, you can get on and live a better life. I know you're not thinking about someone else at the moment and neither should you. You need time to grieve, time to heal, time to be angry and time to be calm. Let time help you to go through those emotions and deal with them one at a time. I hope you go onwards and upwards and that you and the girls eventually have a calm and happy life. :hug2::hug2:PS it's great having a double bed to yourself isn't it :yes:
Val

tb2830
11-07-2010, 12:02 PM
Hi Tracy, thought I'd just drop you a quick line. Haven't been on for ages so I've only just found out about your news. Take care hun, so many of us have been in that situation where the guy has abused us so constantly and totally lowered our self esteem that we really believe them when they say it is all our fault. After a time you will realise (if you haven't yet) that we were not to blame and that the fault lay with them. You will have really down days when you may (?) actually miss him and then you will realise that with the strength regained that he had taken away from you, you can get on and live a better life. I know you're not thinking about someone else at the moment and neither should you. You need time to grieve, time to heal, time to be angry and time to be calm. Let time help you to go through those emotions and deal with them one at a time. I hope you go onwards and upwards and that you and the girls eventually have a calm and happy life. :hug2::hug2:PS it's great having a double bed to yourself isn't it :yes:
Val

thanks val :hug2:

i think its because im tired that im feeling so low.....i feel like im running on auto pilot at the moment and know that i need to pull myself together

im absolutely fine when im in adult company its when im home with no one to talk to that i feel so low

im not missing him at all ..... i have nothing to miss......

tb2830
13-07-2010, 09:21 AM
i have now deleted his numbers from my phone :yes: he has had no contact whatsoever with the kids since he left :nono:

his loss i say:yes:

still waiting on the travel agent to get back to me regarding getting his name of the holiday

i just want it sorted so i can look forward to going.

i also pick the car up on friday so i will be back to wizzing around :yes:

next door knocked on the door today and asked where my car was .... felt a plum sobbing on the door step whilst telling her the story !!!!!

apart from that no more news

Wendy
14-07-2010, 10:34 AM
Just wanted to give you another :hug2: :hug2:

Tink
14-07-2010, 11:43 AM
Sobbing is going to happen. :hug2: It's inevitable, so don't feel bad about yourself for doing that, ok?

Is there anyway you can get a new phone number? :unsure:

josh.p.
14-07-2010, 12:13 PM
Can't believe he hasn't spoken to the kids :sigh: Well, actually, given his other dreadful things he's done it doesn't shock me one bit.

You are better off rid of him :yes:

Don't feel bad about sobbing, it's bound to happen and letting it all out now means you won't be bottling it up :yes:

Deb
14-07-2010, 12:56 PM
A good cry can be a darn good thing....gets some bad feelings out!

Just wanted to pop by and give you a couple of :hug2::hug2: xxxxx

tb2830
14-07-2010, 01:05 PM
Well I feel loads better today ....

It's his loss where the kids are concerned just feel sorry for Tyler as he hasn't been able to go on his quad

Tink
14-07-2010, 11:20 PM
It is sad when a parent forgets that the children shouldn't be caught up in the separation and divorce of the adults. :(

Unfortunately, he will regret it one day, and most likely it will be far too late to make real amends with the children. Either you are there for them, or you are not.

tb2830
15-07-2010, 03:25 PM
It is sad when a parent forgets that the children shouldn't be caught up in the separation and divorce of the adults. :(

Unfortunately, he will regret it one day, and most likely it will be far too late to make real amends with the children. Either you are there for them, or you are not.


yes it is a shame :yes:

thou i already have been told that if they mention me when there with him that he will send them straight back home

so three weeks on no contact whatsoever and

grandma hasnt contacted them either :nono:

Skywatcher
15-07-2010, 04:37 PM
:sigh:

:hug2:

Claire
15-07-2010, 04:53 PM
grandma hasnt contacted them either :nono:

:unimpressed:

tb2830
15-07-2010, 06:04 PM
so now no one from craigs family including himself bothers with the kids :thumbsdown:

arkvilla
15-07-2010, 07:43 PM
As hard as it is now Tracy I believe you will all be better off without any of them interfering in your lives - it will just create trouble, so move ion without the lot of them and give them as little thought as possible :hug2:

Sandra

tb2830
15-07-2010, 07:46 PM
As hard as it is now Tracy I believe you will all be better off without any of them interfering in your lives - it will just create trouble, so move ion without the lot of them and give them as little thought as possible :hug2:

Sandra


believe me sandra the minute i start moving on ..... they'll all have plenty to say .....lets just say the mother in law is like pat butcher and peggy mitchell rolled into one lol

Disneybumble
16-07-2010, 06:05 PM
OMG mate, i am away for a few months. You know l think you are wonderful. And you need good people around you. Stay strong and use that anger wisely.

tb2830
16-07-2010, 06:33 PM
OMG mate, i am away for a few months. You know l think you are wonderful. And you need good people around you. Stay strong and use that anger wisely.

thanks siobhan :hug2:

and ive finally got my car :yes:

tb2830
16-07-2010, 09:41 PM
ive had a another knock back this evening

remember when i told you about my friend leaving her hubby....

well i sorted all his paper work out etc etc only to be told today by chloe that he went drinking with craig last night....he hasnt once picked up the phone to me......

kinda feel like a fool... i was took in once again.....