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View Full Version : Am i being cross for no reason



mainecoon lover
27-11-2008, 03:01 PM
Every christmas i either cook my dh family dinner and supper or arrange for us all to go out some were. they just turn up on the day 10 minutes before its due to be served. this year i arranged to go to local hotel (well 30 miles but that counts as local in Cornwall). My in-laws said they were not coming and just staying at home on there own, fair enough i thought. Dh uncle was coming but today canceled as sil has invited him along to hers and he said he agreed since her parents were going (dh parents). My parents booked to but have always been unsure due to nan being unwell, which i understand. Dh said last night he has to work all christmas and is not 100% sure if he will have to work christmas day. So it looks like dd and i will have cheese on toast as it will be to much work to go on my own with her. Why did dh parents lie to me to start with.
Also dsil and the inlaws have asked us what we want for christmas, i said a surprise as i buy them surprises. Was told if we did not come up with anything then we will not get anything.
Am i being silly but i am quite cross.

MystikPiglit
27-11-2008, 03:14 PM
:hug2: Oh dear, what a muddle. And no, you're not being silly.
Why don't you just plan a cosy day at home with DD and cook your favourite foods.


Was told if we did not come up with anything then we will not get anything.

They really don't understand the spirit of giving, do they. :thumbsdown: Surprise them, ask for cash. :D

Taja
27-11-2008, 03:15 PM
You're very polite, Michelle. A little cross? Goodness! I would be very annoyed, to say the least!

And then over it in a few minutes. :rolleyes: That's just my personality--I can be quite annoyed with people, but I don't hold a grudge--it's too stressful! :lol:

I definitely can understand your viewpoint. You plan and prepare and people don't recognize or appreciate how much time and energy go into it. Even when you elect to dine out, there's always the thought of menus that please everyone.

I don't know that your DH's family weren't truthful about their plans. More likely, just a bit thoughtless. They may have suddenly decided to stay home this year without thinking about arrangements you already have made. Better that they did it now and not at the last minute!

As much as we love being with our family and friends during the holidays, it can be a very stressful time. Occasionally, it's nice to just keep it simple.

Even if your DH is working, you can plan something a bit festive for you and Beth. Not elaborate and a lot of work, just a bit of fun. With an extra plate for your DH if he has to work!

Taja
27-11-2008, 03:17 PM
:hug2: Oh dear, what a muddle. And no, you're not being silly.
Why don't you just plan a cosy day at home with DD and cook your favourite foods.



They really don't understand the spirit of giving, do they. :thumbsdown: Surprise them, ask for cash. :D

I like your idea for a gift request, MP! :lol:

SleepinCatz
27-11-2008, 03:49 PM
Ah Michelle...I get where you're comming from on that. To heak with them, plan something just for yourself,DD and DH and poo to the rest of them! I also agree , if they do not have enough imagination to come up with a gift on thier own then tell them money/gift card.

mumof2
27-11-2008, 05:33 PM
:hug2: oh yes Michelle, i'd be fuming actually....but to heck with them, plan a relaxing day at home with Beth and treat yourselves to your favourites foods and treats, plan the tv viewing or movies and just do nothing all day but eat, chill out and enjoy your time together! :yes:

Britchick
27-11-2008, 05:40 PM
one word ...................FAMILIES ach i giv up :hug2:

Ilovesnowwhitej
27-11-2008, 06:13 PM
Silly NO if anything thats an understatment i would be spitting feathers; how ungrateful, so after doing everything for them every year, you fancy a year of (and why not) i think they are being totally selfish and in a way a bully (if you wont do it like you usually do i am not comming) do you get what i mean. Also why did your sil not invite you guys as she invited everyone else.
As for the present, well if they cannot be bothered to put any effort in then shame on them. Sorry rant over.... Dont lower yourslef to their lever still get them nice surprises they will be the ones who look and maybe feel bad.
Look after your family and do things (watch the tv programms you want to) you cant normally do as you have the family over and enjoy th down time.
xx

mainecoon lover
27-11-2008, 06:22 PM
Thankyou all :huddle:. I am still so cross and boy do they know it. I am just going to have a nice day and actually enjoy Beth opening her presents. The family normally get to do this with her whilst i am rushing around not this year. I feel drained from it all but dh has promised me a brownie and hot chocolate from Starbucks as he passes it on the way home.

mumof2
27-11-2008, 08:11 PM
Thankyou all :huddle:. I am still so cross and boy do they know it. I am just going to have a nice day and actually enjoy Beth opening her presents. The family normally get to do this with her whilst i am rushing around not this year. I feel drained from it all but dh has promised me a brownie and hot chocolate from Starbucks as he passes it on the way home.


good for you! just treat yourselves and take it easy :hug2:

mInNiE
27-11-2008, 08:33 PM
Thankyou all :huddle:. I am still so cross and boy do they know it. I am just going to have a nice day and actually enjoy Beth opening her presents. The family normally get to do this with her whilst i am rushing around not this year. I feel drained from it all but dh has promised me a brownie and hot chocolate from Starbucks as he passes it on the way home.

Sounds perfect and I agree, good for you!! :hug2:

Ursula
27-11-2008, 10:57 PM
Oh this is a huge positive for you hun XXXXXX A stress free day! perfect!

Taja
28-11-2008, 01:21 AM
Excellent idea!

And your DH is a good man! :thumbsup:

mainecoon lover
28-11-2008, 02:12 PM
Thanks all you really are a great bunch :yes::yes::yes::yes:

BevW
28-11-2008, 10:10 PM
you're so not being silly. I'd be fuming...but we won't go there!
Just enjoy your day...nice QUIET peaceful...no cleaning up. no expense, no GRRR day!
:lol:

Val
29-11-2008, 07:48 AM
I would be miffed at the effort I had gone to being wasted, but once over that, I would be jumping for you.

Finally a year when your day is around you guys and your daughter (shame DH has to work) but that happens to me too every other year, and DD and I kick back chill out and do our thing, and then when he comes home, we all relax together, and then we do the xmas dinner thing another day when he is off.

Have a wonderful girlie bonding day..... it will be great.

mumof2
29-11-2008, 11:21 AM
I'm actually really excited for you Michelle, a total chill out day - wonderful! :thumbsup: Just imagine, your favourite food, a relaxing day with only yourselves to think about......they've probably done you a favour 'cos now you don't have any more of that planning stuff to do! Just make the most of it and enjoy yourselves!

We're having a different day this year too!

We're out for Christmas Lunch with the inlaws on Christmas eve, brunch on Christmas morning as DH is working at 2.30pm, (not cooking a big Christmas dinner that day)

My family is coming Christmas Day Tea then we're out early Boxing Day for a walk followed by a pub lunch.....I'm really looking forward to doing something different.....and no christmas dinner to cook - hurrah!

mainecoon lover
30-11-2008, 04:40 PM
I'm actually really excited for you Michelle, a total chill out day - wonderful! :thumbsup: Just imagine, your favourite food, a relaxing day with only yourselves to think about......they've probably done you a favour 'cos now you don't have any more of that planning stuff to do! Just make the most of it and enjoy yourselves!

We're having a different day this year too!

We're out for Christmas Lunch with the inlaws on Christmas eve, brunch on Christmas morning as DH is working at 2.30pm, (not cooking a big Christmas dinner that day)

My family is coming Christmas Day Tea then we're out early Boxing Day for a walk followed by a pub lunch.....I'm really looking forward to doing something different.....and no christmas dinner to cook - hurrah!

Sounds a good christmas to me. I am now looking forward to no stress. I can get up in the morning and not rush or worry. Dh has said this is how it should be every year now. He says we have been doing it for to long and that with Beth getting older its all to much. He says they all have to deal with their own christmas from now on. To be honest it sounds good to me :yes:.
I am still cross with them especially his uncle as apparently he never intended on coming with us to begin with :slap:

mumof2
30-11-2008, 04:43 PM
well i think your DH is right (even if he didn't let you watch the x-factor last week!) i understand you're still cross - i would be too but just let them get on with it and enjoy yourself sweetie :hug2:

mainecoon lover
30-11-2008, 05:37 PM
well i think your DH is right (even if he didn't let you watch the x-factor last week!) i understand you're still cross - i would be too but just let them get on with it and enjoy yourself sweetie :hug2:

I will do :yes:. Thanks hun :hug2:.

Johnie
01-12-2008, 12:23 AM
:hug2: I hope you get to enjoy a wonderful, stress free holiday!

I would be annoyed as well. I would definately ask for cash too :tongue: