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malcolm
19-12-2008, 07:58 PM
A bit of fun..........

You have two choices in life: You can stay single and be miserable, or get married and wish you were dead.

At a cocktail party, one woman said to another, "Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?" "Yes, I am. I married the wrong man."

A lady inserted an ad in the classifieds: "Husband Wanted". Next day she received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: "You can have mine."

When a woman steals your husband, there is no better revenge than to let her keep him.

A woman is incomplete until she is married. Then she is finished.

A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?" Father replied, "I don't know, son, I'm still paying."

A young son asked, "Is it true Dad that in some parts of Africa a man doesn't know his wife until he marries her?" Dad replied, "That happens in every country son."

Then there was a woman who said, "I never knew what real happiness was until I got married and by then it was too late."

Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.

If you want your spouse to listen and pay strict attention to every word you say: talk in your sleep.

Just think, if it wasn't for marriage, men would go through life thinking they had no faults at all.

First guy says, "My wife's an angel!" Second guy remarks, "You're lucky. Mine's still alive."

Finally - A Woman's Prayer:
Dear Lord, I pray for Wisdom, to understand a man, to love and to forgive him and for Patience for his moods. But Lord, if I pray for Strength, I'll just beat him to death!

ukwdwnut
19-12-2008, 08:16 PM
:lol:

foreverducky
19-12-2008, 09:00 PM
:laughhard: I will be sharing these.

PsychoAlice
20-12-2008, 02:23 AM
And why is my family so keen for me to get married?

foreverducky
20-12-2008, 02:27 AM
And why is my family so keen for me to get married?

Misery loves company. :yes:

PsychoAlice
20-12-2008, 02:36 AM
LOL thats just it...Im not miserable..yep I complain but man alive..I dont want no one crampin my style! (ETA that the tube top is making me speak ebonics...)

foreverducky
20-12-2008, 02:39 AM
:lol: My parents accepted years ago that I didn't want to get married. On top of that, I've lived alone so many years now, I can't imagine living with someone. My house, my rules...period.

PsychoAlice
20-12-2008, 02:44 AM
And sharing my bed? Have people lost their minds...I seriously dont know why couples EVER started sleeping in the same bed...there isnt a bed big enough in this world for me to share!

foreverducky
20-12-2008, 02:48 AM
Amen! I will not be subjected to bumps and hits at night, along with being pushed to a corner of the bed and then being told they had no room to sleep. :lol: