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mainecoon lover
27-01-2009, 12:43 PM
Please help me someone. I need to be firm without sounding hard. I employ carers as you all know and they are great carers but i am being walked all over. I did have to sack one last week which i hated but i was doing all the work whilst she played with the cats and it had gone on for months :unsure:. I finally snapped. I now have an issue were one of them comes in and says i want a weekend off in Feb and will tell you nearer the time. They have in their contract that they have to give 3 months notice. I do sway this alot of the time and just say yes. But the fact is they did not ask was it ok they just demanded it. When i said ok can they please give me notice as i will need to cover it with someone else due to dh working weekends at the moment they stompped off :unsure:. Was i being unreasonable. I pay them really well, they get fuel allowance and most days they get to leave an hour early. So how do i handle this without causing an atmosphere.

Tink
27-01-2009, 12:47 PM
Suggest that in these economic times, regardless of how much you dislike letting people go, you can't be spending your carer dollars (well pounds) on people who do not deliver the services you and your child need.

If they don't get THAT then you can step it up and remind them that the only plus to "these economic times" is that there should be little problem in finding carers who are more interested in the position (with you) than this person seems to be.

Keep the focus on the carer's not having done what you need. It's THAT person's issue, not yours. You simply aren't going to allow your money to be spent in an inefficient manner. Having someone who does not perform the way you need them to is one example of not using your money to it's best advantage.

:hug2:

Britchick
27-01-2009, 12:56 PM
ugh, what a nightmare.

can i suggest that you keep a record of all your encounters like this with carers as things can get out of hand and the next thing you hear is the word tribunal.

are you able to interview for bank carers to help you out in such situations? I know that you want the continuity but it would save all the burden being on you. :hug2:

mumof2
27-01-2009, 12:57 PM
Good grief, of course you're not being unreasonable Michelle. :hug2:

They know how much they can usually get away with from you and it wasn't the answer they were expecting.

Remind them firmly you expect advance notice due to DH working and if they cannot give it they will not be able to take the time off - it's down to them, if they want to keep their job they'll sort it out.

keith
27-01-2009, 01:04 PM
definitely not being unreasonable!

If it was "easy" for you to just make do over the weekend, you wouldnt need them in the first place and they wouldn't have a job!

I'd be sitting down, explaining why theyre needed, why they need to give notice and that stomping off, being stroppy or anything else just gives you more to worry about and isn't why you hire carers. I'd then pause and say "so if any of the things I've said make you feel the job just isnt for you, then lets part ways on friendly terms today. If not, then I'll take it that you understand the terms of the position and that you need to give 3 months notice and any lesser time is me doing you a favour ok?"

Taja
27-01-2009, 01:42 PM
Excellent advice--can't add any more.

:hug2:

loadsapixiedust
27-01-2009, 04:43 PM
This is just one aspect that makes me wary of going down the direct payment route.

I think there is a type of person who will take advantage if they can so they need to be dealt with firmly and reminded of their position in the equation. Keith's post above has the tone just right, I'd use that approach. I know good carers are hard to come by but nobody is irreplacable.

Ursula
27-01-2009, 05:57 PM
Your child has to come first and if they don't like it then they are in the wrong job.

Britchick
27-01-2009, 06:00 PM
This is just one aspect that makes me wary of going down the direct payment route.

I think there is a type of person who will take advantage if they can so they need to be dealt with firmly and reminded of their position in the equation. Keith's post above has the tone just right, I'd use that approach. I know good carers are hard to come by but nobody is irreplacable.

i hate the direct payment route, it's supposed to offer choice but from what i've seen in reality it just puts extra stress on carers. I can see where it would work though. We're going totally individualised budgets from April and i am dreading it.

mainecoon lover
27-01-2009, 06:48 PM
Thankyou all :hug2:. She is a good carer and we value her but i will not be walked over. Think i need to become more asertive (sw). Some excellent advice.
britchick i am hoping and hoping we get individualised budgets here in Cornwall but as long as they are done properly.

Britchick
27-01-2009, 07:01 PM
Thankyou all :hug2:. She is a good carer and we value her but i will not be walked over. Think i need to become more asertive (sw). Some excellent advice.
britchick i am hoping and hoping we get individualised budgets here in Cornwall but as long as they are done properly.

don't get me wrong Michelle, i would love for them to work but i've grown quite cynical lol

candyman
27-01-2009, 08:35 PM
personally im so glad we have not got direct payments , as you know we are still waiting for social services to find us carers for heather even after 3 1/2 months but there is no way in the world i could put up with people treating me how you have been treated i would have to speak my mind and i suppose they would leave or i would have to sack them , so i suppose i would have a large turn over in carers and that is just not fair on heather so we wait for social to get there fingers out and find us some .meanwhile we just get to see heather twice a week once when she comes home and once when we go to see her on a sunday .
good luck with how ever you choose to deal with the carer hope it gets sorted ok for you
steve