I never used to be assertive but an experience a couple or so years ago made me take stock of myself and my life and I sure ain't a pushover any more! I used to live my life to please others, and now it's more a case of I like to please others but not to the detriment of my happiness. Saying no is something I had to learn to say even to my own children. I am now a completely different person but I am still described by my friends as having a heart of gold.
I didn't think I had any problems with being assertive and then this morning I was a big old push over. I have a 15 minute rule at work. if you are more than 15 minutes late for your appt then you have to reschedule. As I spent 5 minutes trying to explain this to the woman, I just gave in and saw her
Awww, no honey. Please don't. You did the very best you could with what you had and had to do at that time.
My family tells me that I'm bossy, does that count :rolleyes008:
Actually, I've learned the hard way to learn to assert myself. I guess I just got tired of always being taken advantage of because I didn't know how to say no. I'm also much happier now :p015:
I think it also has to do with knowing that you will not be a poplular person if you say no... so that forces people to say yes when they really don't want to. The trick is to not care if they carry on liking you or not. I can be assertive with all kinds of people even Doctors who alot of people are timid around. I don't care if people carry on liking me or not.