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Thread: Moral Question

  1. #1
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    Okay.. this is for the parents/granparents out there! :p015:

    If your son had asked you if he could have a fish tank (if he payed for it himself!) and you said no because;

    "We're not having anymore animals, you won't look after them"

    but then you where on holiday and left his sister in charge... came back and there was a fish tank- what would you do?

    Would you make him get rid of it? keep it and shout at him? Smash it into tiny pieces?

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    Administrator Tink's Avatar
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    Hmmmmm, I would probably start by asking his sister why she had allowed the parental decision to be revoked.

    Then, I would speak with the son and express my huge disappointment in his disrespecting my decision.

    I am not sure what I would then do. I surely wouldn't cause the fishes death, but depending, I may require that they be given (along with the tank and everything else) away to someone else.






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  3. #3
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    Quote Originally Posted by josh.p., post: 16850
    Okay.. this is for the parents/granparents out there! :p015:

    If your son had asked you if he could have a fish tank (if he payed for it himself!) and you said no because;

    "We're not having anymore animals, you won't look after them"

    but then you where on holiday and left his sister in charge... came back and there was a fish tank- what would you do?

    Would you make him get rid of it? keep it and shout at him? Smash it into tiny pieces?

    i would shout at you then let you keep it, but as my kids will tell you im well known for giving in for a peaceful life
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

  4. #4
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    Quote Originally Posted by josh.p., post: 16850
    Okay.. this is for the parents/granparents out there! :p015:

    If your son had asked you if he could have a fish tank (if he payed for it himself!) and you said no because;

    "We're not having anymore animals, you won't look after them"

    but then you where on holiday and left his sister in charge... came back and there was a fish tank- what would you do?

    Would you make him get rid of it? keep it and shout at him? Smash it into tiny pieces?



    The sister would be in trouble first for allowing him to go against their wishes and then the son would be in trouble for the same thing.

    I wouldn't smash the tank, but the son wouldn't be keeping either. It's a matter of respect also and if he just figured that while they were gone he'd do it and take the yelling, but still get what he wanted.......nope, that ain't gonna happen in my house.

  5. #5
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    Have to agree with Tink and Dorothy.

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    Heaven's no! No violence. That wouldn't teach a thing. I'm a firm believer in consequences for actions (good or not so good). I believe that prepares a child better for life experiences. If we drive too fast we get a speeding ticket. If we work hard in uni, we get a degree with excellent grades that leads to the potential for a good job... so on.

    If I had said no, then I'd have had a good reason for it, so would stick to it.

    Now, that's not to say a child shouldn't be allowed to negotiate things. "No, no fish, you won't care for them." "How about if I start with a small tank and one/two fish and show you that I will?" That sort of thing is healthy and allows the child to have some contribution to the decision making.

    At the end of the day a parent is just that, a parent and needs to take responsibility for being one. It's often not a popular position, eh? :sigh;






    Welcome to our new home! It's a lovely and friendly place. If you haven't joined yet, do register. It's a great place to make friends and share all those Disney secrets!!

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  7. #7
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    I agree with Sister Tink & Dorothy . If my decision was no and he went behind my back and did it anyway, the fish tank would go . Sorry , its a matter of respect .

  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tink, post: 16877
    Heaven's no! No violence. That wouldn't teach a thing. I'm a firm believer in consequences for actions (good or not so good). I believe that prepares a child better for life experiences. If we drive too fast we get a speeding ticket. If we work hard in uni, we get a degree with excellent grades that leads to the potential for a good job... so on.

    If I had said no, then I'd have had a good reason for it, so would stick to it.

    Now, that's not to say a child shouldn't be allowed to negotiate things. "No, no fish, you won't care for them." "How about if I start with a small tank and one/two fish and show you that I will?" That sort of thing is healthy and allows the child to have some contribution to the decision making.

    At the end of the day a parent is just that, a parent and needs to take responsibility for being one. It's often not a popular position, eh? :sigh;
    I just saw this Sister Tink and it reminded me to tell you what I did to my DS when he was 16 . He had his first job at a hospital and got involved with the wrong crowd . He came in after curfew , accepted punishment to calmly and was just to quiet . I opened the paper to see that friends that worked with him were arrested for robbing a Liqour Store . I was frantic , he walked in from school and I calmly handed him the paper waiting for the reaction . Seeing tears I knew he was scared, but I marched his deerie erre right up to the police station .
    Luckily he was left behind at the party site, but the beer was brought back . He didn't know until they all started and said where the beer came from . He left and came home . The detective appreciated him coming in and he never heard anymore about it .
    He was punished for a month . No after school activities , nothing .
    He was so relieved he didn't care and never went behind my back again .
    Sorry to derail your thread , joshp

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    What is that line from Steel Magnolias? Something like, "That's because you were raised right." Fits here, eh?






    Welcome to our new home! It's a lovely and friendly place. If you haven't joined yet, do register. It's a great place to make friends and share all those Disney secrets!!

    "It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it. ~Aristotle

  10. #10
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    Yes, Ma'am ! Pat still brings it up that I MADE HIM soil his pants . LOL sorry

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