Please read this beautiful piece written by a Mum about her 5 year old son. Thought provoking, lump in throat inducing stuff. I would love to high five her if I met her in the street!
Originally Posted by Deafjeff, post: 237511
I agree with the above post.
A 5 year old wouldnít worry about this if he wasnít taught by a parent to care or be aware of what other people think about him. He just wouldnít care.
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However I do commend his Mum for embracing his character and loving him for who he is. I think he looks adorable in his costume.
If you truly want a child to grow up without prejudice and lots of self worth for who they are then the first thing they need to know is that other peopleís opinions donít count and should have no influence over their choices, feelings or beliefs.
I find the whole piece a little bit contradictory, if she really was accepting then why is she ranting or blogging about these other parents? I do understand how hurtful it is when people say hurtful things to our kids, I recently had to deal with a homophobic teacher, you do feel frustrated, but I still donít feel a 5 year old would have cared enough to be worried.
Sadly the playground Mum mafia have always existed and always will, they will have an opinion on everyone who isnít them, be it reading levels to disruptive children who are hampering their childís genius abilities. Why care, if her son is gay, straight somewhere in between, green or striped, heís only 5. The best way is to ignore them and pity them, other than that give them a wide berth and forget them.
What I mean is that children that young will only worry about what other people think if they have been taught to. They arenít really affected by peers properly until about the age of 7-8, the other parents could have been disapproving because his costume was too scary, or that they felt it was age inappropriate. Do you think if this had been the issue that the same 5 year old child in question would have been worried about it, or concerned at the disapproving nature of the adult conversations taking place in front of him?
I have no idea why she is already attaching labels to him, gay not gay. That is one he needs to work out for himself when heís good and ready, I do think she said that in a way. In the meantime she needs to let him know, yup, sometimes people will be mean to us when they donít like what we wear, but we donít care what they think as they donít count and arenít having as much fun as us. She needs to save her energy and frustration for when heís a self-conscious teenager.
I think somebeody had said something to him to make him think that people would be like that towards him. I have a 4 yr old (well, 4 in a couple of days!) and she knows what she likes and thats that, at the moment she looks wonderful in anything and everything she chooses and id like to keep it that way forever but i know that wont happen, one day someone will make a comment to her and thats the end of it. If that makes sense?!
As someone who works in a school I can tell you that 5 year old do worry about things like this. And the fault lies with the adults that influence them.
Originally Posted by Dawn, post: 237541
or from other children, and i suppose their opinions come from *their* adults/older siblings. I've heard some terrible things in school.
edited to add: a few years back there was a lad in my DS11 class, he's moved away now, anyway DS11 used to tell me how the boy wanted to be a girl. My response was along the lines of 'oh right' as an acknowledgement and nothing else. i don't want him to think there's anything to make an issue about, if that's how the boy feels it how he feels, full stop. Nowt to do with anyone else.